What Happens in Congress, Does Not Stay in Congress
Every year, the Early College students attend a trip called the Ex-Term, where students learn about the culture and environment of the place they are visiting. This year, EC students visited Washington D.C. In addition to going on the trip, students must complete a project related to the location they are visiting. One element of the project this year was to write a satirical piece about relocating the capital of the United States. Below is this piece.
A feature article by Diana Barbacioru, Ram Charan, Varnika Dhandapani, Kimia Faroughi, Michael Hom, Sonia Pramanick and Alexander Zhou
Unforeseen, unprecedented changes in our government have necessitated a shift in the location for the capital of the United States of America. Upon relocating, government officials have pondered the selection of Washington D.C. as the capital of the United States. The history behind this decision bears great significance, especially when it comes to making the choice of where the new capital should be. Nevertheless, after long, deliberate evaluation of what makes a capital city viable, what existing city embodies these characteristics, and how the move to the new city would work out logistically, a best candidate was easily selected for our country’s new capital. After all, which city could be more qualified to replace Washington D.C. than Sin City, the Gambling and Entertainment Capital of the World, America’s Playground: the great city of Las Vegas.
Contrary to public belief, Washington D.C. has not always been home to the President of the United States and essential federal departments. Between 1785 and 1800, New York City and Philadelphia were both designated as capital cities. Washington D.C. then became the capital in 1790, but the Senate and other federal institutions only officially moved after 1800 due to the lengthy construction process. The city was built from scratch, around the Potomac River, between the states of Virginia and Maryland. Behind one of the reasons why Washington D.C. was selected as the capital city was a compromise. After the Constitution was signed, there was great debate between the Northern and Southern states, as both wanted the new nation’s capital to be located in their respective regions. Eventually though, Virginia and Maryland both ceded some of their land for the formation of a new federal territory, the District of Columbia. George Washington believed the location of the new capital to be superior for its prime location on the Potomac River, which would connect the Northern and Southern states and be in close proximity to two major port cities, George Town and Alexandria, Virgina.
Despite the historical significance of Washington D.C. and the convenience it served to the founding fathers, there are many reasons as to why the capital must be relocated. The capital of the United States of America must be moved because of the intolerable weather. Washington D.C. is marked by humid weather that makes taking a nice stroll something akin to an endurance exercise. This is bound to get worse as climate change continues to raise global temperatures. During summer, by the time a congressman or congresswoman slips outside for a slice of pizza, they will be drenched in sweat from the unforgiving, scorching sun. The weather is just as bad toward the latter end of the year, when there is increased rain and a greater threat of hurricanes. Many may argue that this natural disaster could be avoided by building levees, however, past examples show how this may not work. For example, in 1965, New Orleans spent hundreds of millions of dollars to protect itself, which did little to prevent Hurricane Betsy from devastating the city. It is now so obvious as to why Congress is always gridlocked; it is in no way bipartisanship, it is simply the weather. To fulfill the general dream of congressmen and women being able to do their jobs with dry clothes is a priority of the government, and thus the capital must be relocated because of this.
To further improve the demeanor of congressmen and women, the capital must be moved closer to California. In terms of the House of Representatives, California outnumbers any other state with 53 members. Having the most members in the House should mean that California representatives have some sort of priority over other representatives, and yet, they have some of the greatest difficulty in their commuting routine. In fact, they have to travel around two-thousand seven-hundred miles to reach the capital. Even worse, they would have to reach D.C. only to be confronted by such hostile weather, which is far inferior to the weather in paradise-like California. Although the Internet and communication technology have certainly reduced the number of times representatives need to travel, it is still inevitable that they must journey across the nation for activities such as reaching voters. First, they could not attend work without dry clothes; now, they cannot do their jobs because they are absorbed by trying to run campaigns and make their long commutes. Senators and Representatives do not seem to be catching any breaks. By moving the capital to somewhere closer to California, congressmen and women in California would find better convenience in weather and travel time. Therefore, if we help to make their lives easier, the general demeanor among members of congress would improve significantly.
Another reason why the capital must be abandoned is that it would improve the conditions of Washington, D.C. Currently, Washington, D.C. has one of the widest income gaps in the nation, partially due to the large number of investments and salaries of lobbyists. Furthermore, the city also suffers from poverty. By moving the capital, space available for new institutions to develop would increase. Also, because the general demeanor of congressmen and congresswomen would improve drastically, bipartisanship and gridlock in Congress would be nearly eliminated. Newer policy to support development would pass easily. Washington D.C. could incorporate the most recent improvements in modern cities. It could be a city centered on mass transit and walking. It could even be a city powered by renewable energy sources such as solar and wind. There is no limit to the possible improvements in Washington D.C.
The new capital of the United States of America could become a symbol of the country’s strength and capabilities as a nation. Of course, relocating the capital would cost a significant amount of money, but using the money in the short-term can lead to invaluable benefits in the future that will undoubtedly cover the costs.
Considering the recent arrest of Donald Trump and the confiscation of his properties around the country, the government was forced to relocate the capital of the United States. As a way to prevent Trump from having any further communication with the Russian government, the federal government has chosen Las Vegas as the new capital due to the established city center and infrastructure it already has. It also made sense to the government to take advantage of the properties that Donald Trump already has around the country and use one of them to become the center of the new capital. It is a practical decision because it will save the government millions of dollars from having to rebuild from scratch.
Moving the capital to Las Vegas will also ensure that California’s representatives remain happy, which is important considering the struggles they are dealing with from the Trump Administration. Saving them time from having to travel across the country and having entertainment, such as gambling, to calm them down prevents these officials from taking any negative action against the federal government.
Another factor that makes Las Vegas qualified to be the capital of the US is the vast number of people that visit the city every year. It is important for the country’s capital to be a vibrant location that people are attracted to in order to boost tourism and the economy. In 2016 alone, around 43 million people visited Las Vegas, whereas in the same year, only around 22 million people visited Washington D.C. These significant differences further demonstrate how beneficial it could be to the tourism sector of the economy if the nation’s capital was Las Vegas. The wide appeal of Las Vegas to people all across the country and the world cannot be unmatched.
If the capital of the United States were to be in the city of Las Vegas, it would provide a sense of unity amongst Americans. People of all backgrounds visit Las Vegas for the same exact reasons: the city’s wild, exciting atmosphere. Las Vegas has everything that an average American looks for in their capital city: history, culture, vibrancy, great weather, captivating entertainment, and many gambling opportunities. Nothing embodies the American spirit more than a city like Las Vegas, in which ordinary people have built something larger than life, that is extremely profitable, and slightly sinful, from the ground up.
Moving the capital of the United States of America will be no easy task, and to do this, there must be a consideration of where to physically place many of the institutions located in Washington D.C. Two of the major institutions that must be relocated are the headquarters for both the Internal Revenue Service and the Department of Treasury. They will be located jointly along “The Strip,” a one mile stretch of road where there are dozens of casinos. The financial nature of this area symbolically presents itself as the perfect area to house both agencies. They represent a sense of authority in a city notoriously famous for its duplicitous financial dealings. The Treasure Island Casino was seized by the government through the clever use of eminent domain and now, both institutions will be located within the casino.
The space represents a micro government hub which will be joined by other institutions. The entire area of “the strip” will eventually be transformed into a site for other government institutions, including most of the 15 departments of the United States. The government found the funds, which would eventually further the country into catastrophic levels of debt, to purchase the private casinos of “The Strip.” However, this area still contains commercial use buildings showing how the people and government and business can coexist harmoniously.
As a part of the new government vision for “the strip,” the Trump International Hotel, the new White House and Capitol Building, will be at the head of Las Vegas Boulevard. In the aftermath of Trump’s arrest, following an intense scandal during which he was exposed for selling secrets to the Russian Government through the use of a hair-like helmet device, his properties were confiscated by the federal government. One of these properties was the Trump International Hotel, and both the White House and the Capitol Building will be housed in this area. The floors will be evenly divided into space for both the Capitol Building and the floor plans of the hotel will be reinvisioned to incorporate offices for both senators and representatives. There will be assembly halls and two separate chambers to house discussion of both groups. To do this, infrastructure will have to be built underneath the tower to help provide more space.
The National Archives protects the history of the United States through the preservation of irreplaceable documents. Documents such as the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence define this nation and must be transported to the new capital. The National Archives will be joined with the Library of Congress, to provide research materials and the foundational records of the United States to Congress. This selection of documents and information will be located in Caesars Palace on “The Strip” in Las Vegas. Caesars Palace is reminiscent of the Ancient Greek and Roman Empires. The building itself was constructed to remember the triumphs of the past, and can now fulfill a patriotic duty–safeguarding the records of the United States so future generations can look back and revisit a time before global warming made the planet unbearable.
Representing the third pillar of American democracy is the Supreme Court. The highest court in the United States will be providing equal justice under law from the Clark County Detention Center in Las Vegas, Nevada. The productivity and prosperity of the American criminal justice system has made the United States the country with the largest incarcerated population. Clark County Detention Center houses approximately 1,000 inmates, and maintains the second floor for administrative duties. The second floor has ample space for the workings of the Supreme Court. For alleged criminals to understand the imminent threats of prison overcrowding, capital punishment, and mandatory prison sentences when they visit the detention center will be the most effective crime deterrants. Having the Supreme Court so closely connected to the prison will also cut costs for transporting prisoners and solidify the flawless American criminal justice system in the minds of the people.
There is no future for Washington D.C. to be maintained as the capital of the United States of America. Its historical value aside, the unbearable weather and horrid conditions demand the relocation of the capital. Las Vegas and its bright entertainment industry, prime location, and modern infrastructure are just a few reasons why it would be a fantastic new capital city. And while it will take years, and financial investment to relocate all the federal departments and national treasures, it will be worth the effort.